February 11, 2021

The Year of the Womxn.

The Year of the Womxn.

Yesterday with much trepidation I asked a roaster to cancel an order for a few coffee mugs.  I only gained the confidence to type “ I hate to be a pain, and will certainly avoid doing so in the future, but can I cancel the mug order” after asking my partner if it was bad form to ask for a refund. I talked myself down such a rabbit hole, feeling guilty for making extra work for someone, for causing a fuss. The fear of making a request that might make me more of a complicated client for them, lead them to ‘drop me’ was so daunting that I almost avoided it entirely.

Where in the world does this aversion to taking up space come from?

My mom didn’t raise me to shy away. My teachers didn’t harp on being more lady like. My coaches affirmed me, demanding that I enter a tackle like a strong woman. So why was, why am, I so hesitant to speak up for myself.

We don’t ask for raises, I mean, they’ll notice the extra work, the extra hours we are putting in.
We let the credit go to someone else because they probably deserved it more.
We don’t want to appear brash or loud, so we opt for chiming in ‘offline’.

“Not a problem at all!” was how the roaster promptly responded as they issued a refund for the mugs I no longer needed.

Don’t make yourself small, take up space, womxn.

Advocate for what you need and deserve - from a return to a promotion, make your case.  
Take credit and give credit where deserved.  
Your opinion is valid and magical, give power to it.
  

2021 is the year of the womxn. 

 Artwork by Christina Animashaun/Vox

1 comment

  • Tara Woodin on March 23, 2021

    Perfectly said! It is so important that we keep reminding ourselves and each other to be stronger and to ask for what we deserve. We are stronger than we often credit ourselves. Fight like a woman. Smash the patriarchy.

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